CPSP Pastoral Report

Using biblical examples from both testaments she presented a clear picture of how shame has been an integral factor in shaping how societies develop behavioral norms, boundaries and reinforces values. Shame, McNish argued, is the paradox of the human condition: to live in the reality of a finite body while understanding ourselves as made in the image of the Divine. This same tension is paralleled in the human yearning to merge with the larger collective all the while suffering the dread of losing the individual self that this merger implies. Without shame, there can be no real society or understanding of our own creaturliness in relationship to God.

McNish joked with participants that when she told her colleagues that the subject of her doctoral thesis was on shame; their response was a palpable silence or resistance to the topic. Mc Nish noted that the topic is “very close to the bone” in all of us and invariably elicits an unconscious return to our own feelings of shamefulness that leave us feeling less than ourselves. Even within the NCTS conference, McNish commented that the group seemed resistant to the topic. Shame is damaging to our sense of self and has as its subsidiaries guilt, embarrassment and shyness. Unlike guilt which is attached to an action, shame transcends remediation of an action we have either committed or failed to do; shame strips us of our concept of our very self in relationship to others. The gravity of shameful experience can be seen in its defenses including depression, addictions, envy, abuse of power, self-righteousness, withdrawal, perfectionism and often violent acting out. Every age suffers with its developmentally induced shame: the dependency of infancy; sexual awareness in adolescence; the failures and rejections of adulthood; and the body issues of old age.

McNish challenged the group to imagine faith communities wherein shame could be safely explored and confronted. Do we, as CPSP, confront our own sources of shame? One could say that CPSP itself strives to do this very thing by claiming as part of its mission “recovery of soul” and through the creation of chapter life in which members are invited to share not just the work they do but the fullness of themselves, shameful and otherwise.

On a corporate level, it might be said that CPSP has had to deal with the organizational shame of being a child of its parent, ACPE, which has worked to shame CPSP in the larger society rather than celebrate its birth and development. What is it to be the child of a parent that seeks to disown it, to deny its legitimacy? How does CPSP’s own healthy narcissism and understanding of self suffer from never having been afforded the gleam in our parent’s eye? To our credit, we have been like the hyacinth bulb forced in winter—a fragrant reminder that spring is deep within us ready to be born, even when the traditional soil has been stripped from us. We have brought pastoral care and supervision to new places. We have served in leadership positions in centers and organizations locally and globally and in dialogue with members of our sister pastoral care organizations. We have granted equivalency to those certified by other sister organizations seeking certification with us. We have carried out the very work which has birthed us.

CPSP has already proven itself as a vital, life giving organization that wants to serve a hurting world in whatever ways it can. That has, however, proven shameful to our parent because our identity has become a source of competition not pride. Our failure to receive the blessing of our parent has inspired us to claim our own path in pastoral care in new and innovative ways and structure which have differentiated us from ACPE. ACPE’S recent motion 43 to ask centers to drop dual accreditation is to metaphorically have the shame carried out into the desert like a scapegoat and be rid of it. But CPSP will not go away, even as some of its supervisors are cut out from traditional settings because of ACPE desire for monopoly. Sadly, it is the centers themselves that will be deprived of good people to serve them; the shame is passed along to those who choose alphabets over people.

The fact is both ACPE and CPSP are here to stay—here to stay to serve a world broken apart by addiction, violence, war, emptiness and spiritual hunger. Our prayer should be
“ the harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few”; therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.” (Luke 10:2) not whose harvest it is or whose laborers should go.

Bonnie Olson