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November 14, 2006
"TO CLING OR NOT TO CLING, THAT IS THE QUESTION...": Reflections on the Fall 2006 CPSP NTCS Gathering by Jerry K. Shields
This was my first experience at a National Training Clinical Seminar (NTCS) sponsored by the College of Pastoral Supervision and Psychotherapy (CPSP), and it was a good one. This was one of those many occasions in my life in which I was hesitant about going but after it was all over I was glad I did. Most of the people were strangers, the traveling distance from the security and familiar surroundings of Virginia, more time away from work and family, and many more reasons did not make the decision to attend an easy one.
One of the significant influences of this training was how helpful it was to my personal adjustment stage of mandatory retirement (at the age of 62) from the Navy Chaplain ministry and the transitioning I'm going through back to civilian life. The subject matter couldn't have been more appropriate for me. It was like going to church and feeling like the minister's sermon was written just for me.
"Attachment & Separation/Anxiety Theory" of John Bowlby was the didactic presentation for the two days by Dr. David Franzen, a CPSP Diplomate. I mentally acknowledged and viscerally felt the pain and joy of the truth of Bowlby's theory as it applied to my retirement stage. John Bowlby (1907-1990) was a British development psychologist of the psychoanalytic tradition, who I had never heard of in all my years of academic and practical education and training. Google his name and you will learn more about his psychoanalytic theory.
Bowlby's theory of attachment is based on instinctual behavioral patterns developed and integrated within an "environment of adaptedness." Although his focus is biological, e.g. the child's attachment to mother, for me there is a real sense understanding of the dynamics of attachment developing within a community, such as the church or the Navy. Dr. Franzen presented a personal slice of his family that demonstrated this, and he also provided a theological reflection on attachment. To quote from one of his slides: "In the Genesis creation story, humans are created to live in relationship with God and with each other." This would be the ultimate attachment theory.
I was mindful of the many, varied types of attachments over the years of my life. Names and faces of parents, children, pets, relatives, neighbors, colleagues, surfaced to reveal how much I was attached and shaped by the significant influence of their relationships. The key to managing the distress of separation from these attachments depends on the care receive. From one of the studies (Robertson Foster Parenting Study) it was demonstrated that "care by a responsive foster mother holds anxiety at a manageable level and permits positive development." The value of a good pastoral care plan for a patient and a personal care-for-the-caregiver plan was affirmed again.
All kinds of attachment associations began ringing, such as, "I will cling to the old rugged cross," and "hate what is evil and cling to what is good"( Romans 12:9). I paraphrased the words of Shakespeare, "To cling or not to cling, that is the question (or dilemma) we face all the days of our lives.
Someone at the retreat made the statement that CPSP is all about attachment, and this community is where I have found my new sense of support and care that will hopefully help me manage the stress of separation anxieties and grief in retirement and the loss of parents and friends. This support and care has already been received from particular persons at the retreat and my local CPSP chapter.
The two days were full of great food at three meals a day plus evening snacks, meeting strangers and making new friends, sharing and learning among the CPSP extended family and process of case studies; and all this within the beautiful pastoral setting of the Carmel Retreat Center in the mountains of New Jersey.
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Jerry K. Shields is a Pastoral Counselor & Clinical Chaplain at the Portsmouth Naval Medical Center, Portsmouth, VA.
Posted by Perry Miller, Editor at November 14, 2006 10:34 PM