The College of Pastoral Supervision & Psychotherapy is a theologically based covenant community, dedicated to "recovery of the soul" and promoting competency in the clinical pastoral field.
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I'm confident that I have just read one of the most deeply human and profound descriptions of the work of the clinical chaplain that I have ever encountered.
Kerry Egan is a hospice chaplain in Massachusetts and the author of "Fumbling: A Pilgrimage Tale of Love, Grief, and Spiritual Renewal on the Camino de Santiago."
She is featured in a CNN article published January 28, 2012 entitled My Faith: What People Talk about Before They Die.
She starts her article with an encounter with her seminary professor who quizzed her what she talked with dying people about in her clinical internship at a cancer Hospital:
"I talk to the patients," I told him."You talk to patients? And tell me, what do people who are sick and dying talk to the student chaplain about?" he asked.
I had never considered the question before. “Well,” I responded slowly, “Mostly we talk about their families.”
“Do you talk about God?
“Umm, not usually.”
“Or their religion?”
“Not so much.”
“The meaning of their lives?”
“Sometimes.”
“And prayer? Do you lead them in prayer? Or ritual?”
“Well,” I hesitated. “Sometimes. But not usually, not really.”
I felt derision creeping into the professor's voice. “So you just visit people and talk about their families?”
“Well, they talk. I mostly listen.”
“Huh.” He leaned back in his chair.
The next week in the professor's lecture he, without using her name, attempted to shame her clinical practice of ministry by saying: "...if I was ever sick in the hospital, if I was ever dying, that the last person I would ever want to see is some Harvard Divinity School student chaplain wanting to talk to me about my family.”
Obviously the professor believed that this was a time to talk about God, faith and life beyond, not family and loved ones. The young student said that she felt shame and regret now thinking that a more seasoned chaplain would have addressed the God and other theological issues with the dying. She had failed.
Thirteen years later, however, she is now a hospice chaplain. Without hesitancy she declares that she would give the same answer to the professor if asked again. She knows as most of us know as clinical chaplains, pastoral psychotherapists and counselors, usually the dying talk about their families and loved ones, not god, religion, faith, theology unless coerced by a chaplain or pastoral provider with their own agenda and counter-tranference issues.
Chaplain Egan gives a beautiful expression to what actually happens when the chaplain stays out of the way and soulfully listens:
"Mostly, they talk about their families: about their mothers and fathers, their sons and daughters.
They talk about the love they felt, and the love they gave. Often they talk about love they did not receive, or the love they did not know how to offer, the love they withheld, or maybe never felt for the ones they should have loved unconditionally.They talk about how they learned what love is, and what it is not. And sometimes, when they are actively dying, fluid gurgling in their throats, they reach their hands out to things I cannot see and they call out to their parents: Mama, Daddy, Mother."
I encourage you to read the full article. If you are a training supervisor, I hope you will pass it on to your trainees as well as your colleagues.
Perry Miller, Editor
____________________
Perry Miller, D. Min.
NC State Board Psychotherapist/Clinical Supervisor
perrymiller@gmail.com
(919) 442-8181
PCCI.ORG
Posted by Perry Miller, Editor at January 29, 2012 11:57 PM
